Kristy Koreen Palizzi Ragsdale

Yesterday,
January 6
Was my friend Kristy's Birthday.
The big 31
Happy Birthday Kristy.




It was also the one year anniversary of her death.


It was too close to my heart yesterday to talk about it
or write about it much.

That was a hard day.
A horrible, nasty, hard day.
I hated it.
The only glimmer or goodness in it
was the fact that my other best friends
in the world
came with me
when I went to her house
to make sure it was true.
Thank you Ryan, and Caitlin, and Holly, and Sandra
For loving me enough
to hold me up
through
that.
It sucked.


Kristy's mom.
Anne.
What an Elect Lady.
She hugged me and held me
and told me that it was true.
And told me that she loved me
and that Kristy loved me.
And that I saw her flaws and her warts,
not just her beauty and wit,
and I loved her anyway.
And that I was special because of that.
Wow.
That was the perfect thing to say
Because all the sudden
I was afraid that I hadn't been
A good enough friend
A close enough supporter
A big enough heart.
But I loved her.
I do.
I miss her.




Her husband David shot her in her church parking lot
as she was walking in to church.
On her birthday
13 times
Anne was 6 feet away.
A dad with two little boys was not much further than that.
Other families not much further from them.
The first shot killed her.
But he continued to shoot
Even after she fell
Face down
In the snow.
I figure its a good thing that I believe in
the complete and total justice and judgment of God.
Because then I can just think
that no matter what happens here on earth,
He's got it coming in a big way
once he reaches that judgment seat.


He looked nasty at his preliminary hearing,
like a saggy, empty shell of the man he had once been.
I guess being filled with Satan,
and then being abandoned,
will do that to you.
I shudder to think to about how much damage
that much evil
can do to you.

The power of Satan is real
I am so glad that I know that.
The Mercy and Love of Jesus Christ
and the power of the Atonement are real too.
I can live forever and see my Friend,
And my mother,
again someday.
I live my life, and I love my life,
and I can be happy in this life
Because I know that.
Kristy knew that too.


I pray for her two little boys,
now five and two and a half
and I miss them coming over to play,

both before
(Caden and Brandon at the Dinosaur museum, Kristy and Carter in the background)
Carter


and after Kristy died.
(Caden and Brandon playing with Ryan)



We went to visit Kristy's grave today.


Caden wanted to get out and come too.
He wanted to see Kristy.
I had to explain that her body was there buried deep
But that her heart and her spirit lived
with Heavenly Father
in Heaven.
I had done pretty well up until this point
and then Caden asked
"Well, are you going to say something to her?"
before I could reply he said
"You should tell her that you miss her and that you wish she could come back."
The tears started then.
I do miss her.
I do wish she could come back.
He saw I was crying and patted my hand and told me it was okay.
I asked if he wanted to sing her a song.
(Kristy loved to sing and loved music)
He nodded and when I asked him what song
he said decisively "Jingle Bells"
I started to laugh.
Kristy would have LOVED that!
She would have snorted while she was laughing
and LOVED it.
So Caden and I stood there up to our knees in the snow
Singing Jingle Bells
For Kristy.

This is the link to Kristy's Memory Blog. Friends and Family have posted stories and letters and pictures. There are hits by the thousands from literally ALL over the world. She knew tons of people and was so crazy and funny that EVERYONE who met her remembered her and could tell a story about her.

My kids are cool...

And, they love to have their pictures taken.


In fact, they love it so much,
that is is hard for me to get them to take one
without the posing.


"Stand up, Kenna, so I can take your picture."
"But take a picture now. I'm doin' the booty dance"
Caden immediately chimed in.
"Kenna, grandma doesn't like it when we say booty"
"I'm not sayin booty, I'm sayin booty dance"


Cohen is quickly learning the posing, and the cheese face too.
If I have the camera he will follow me around yelling
"Teese! Teese!"

See what blogging has done to my children?

Caden will call for me

"Mom, you better get your camera
and see what Kenna is doing."

When he says that, it is never good.
Sometimes funny, but never good.

Whats A Girl To Do

I ran out to get the mail.
Caden and Kenna were crying by the front door that they wanted to come too.
As I was running out I yelled
no, you don't have shoes on.



Caden came out on my way back with his snow boots on to walk me back.
What a gentleman.


Then this little number came strolling out the door.


I almost dropped the mail.


Then I almost peed my pants I was laughing so hard.


I guess I forgot to mention that
clothing
was also a
requirement.
And maybe boots that matched,
and that weren't on the wrong feet.

I didn't even have to say anything.
(Not that I could have. I was laughing too hard)
Caden put his arm around her and explained all the reasons
we don't go in the snow naked.
(Your bumbo will get cold,
and if you fall down
your underwears will get all wet.)

Man my day needed that.
My only regret is that my camera is broken,
so I had to get Caden's and I didn't realize till after I took the pictures that the lense had goobery hand prints on it, so the pictures are blurry.
Oh well.
One more reason to love the snow.
And the Kenna Girl.

New Years.

Nobody parties like us.

Wrong.
We rarely party.
Come on... with three kids?
But, it was New Years.

So Holly and Cory came over.
Both as Good Looking as ever.

I told Holly that I hate it that I always look like crap in pictures because I am always so busy running around cleaning that I don't have time to put make up on before the party.

She got right down to business.

Holly said we looked like "two dolla hookers."
I love it.
If this is what "two dolla hookers" look like, bring it on.

So while we were doing makeup (there we are on the couch)
Cory and Ryan were rockin out with rock band.

And Cohen was helping me catch up on blogging.
You didn't know he blogged?
Well he does now. (Evidently.)

Kim (or Kimella as Kenna calls her)
Was singing to Ariel and Snow White on the couch.
They were enthralled.
When she would finish a song they would be quiet and then say, Brinley's turn.
Sing again.

Phlip and Laura dropped in after Phlip's
(otherwise known to you as my resident computer expert)
Birthday Dinner.

Watching Dick Clarks Rockin Eve and waiting for the ball to drop.

Ryan and I Kissing this year goodbye and saying
BRING ON THE NEXT!
We can take it!

Laughter? Yes, Please!

Cohen's giggle is priceless.
Its not hard to induce.
Just wiggle your fingers like you might tickle him,
and there you go.
Not talking yet, just giggling.
Caden is the Champ at making him giggle.

(P.S. Please ignore the messy house surrounding the cute kids.)

Winter Wonderland

It warmed a little.
Not enough to melt the feet of snow that we have
but enough to make some fog.



Then it got dark and froze.
And then we got this for Christmas eve.


Doesn't it look magical?



I love winter. And even if you don't... Isn't it beautiful?
I am thankful for a world full of beautiful things.

Christmas Celebration

So every year,
well, for the past three years,
but whatever, every year,
I, My sister Holly, and Caitlin our BFFL,
(Holly that was for you)

(I had to explain to Holly what the acronym bffl meant after we saw it on a t-shirt at Kohls and she looked at me like I was nuts that I knew it meant best friends for life...duh...come on..., kidding, give me some credit, no I am not in middle school...I have worked with teenage girls for seven years...you learn things...anyway)

What I am trying to say is that we have a dinner and exchange gifts every year. We try to make it nice, but I, UNFAILINGLY mess it up.

Last year I was an HOUR late because I had to make rolls from scratch and they wouldn't rise and then they did and then I had to bake them at my house because if I took them in the cold they would deflate or something, anyway again, I was an hour late, and by the time I got there, nobody wanted to eat them because they were so full from eating the appatizers while waiting for me, that they weren't hungry.

So this year it was at my house.

I was excited because I can't be late to my own house right?
Wrong.
I can be late to anything!
Anything.
Ask Holly and Caitlin.
They know this better than anyone.
Caitlin came over to help and she patiently prompted me every five minutes
(Yes Cait, I know this is what you were doing:-) )
What do you need to do now? Where is this? Can I help you with this? Where are the dishes? Have you started this?

I think I am ADD or something. Luckily, they like me anyway.

So I hate reading blogs where people just write paragraphs, but you had to know the story behind the story, so
on with the real blog that includes the pictures.



Holly was in charge of bringing the sparkling cider (Holly and Caitlin are serious about this dinner business.)
She got four, but the 80 yr old man at the register rang her up for SEVEN so she had to go and get three more, or brave the customer service line at WalMart
to get her money back
(she got three more).


Luckily the weather provided us with a
perfect cider chiller.
A foot of snow and my barbeque grill.



I dug out my Christmas fancy glasses.
I always forget I have them and then I am so disappointed that I missed another year to use them.
Caitlin did not believe me that they were from Arby's.
Those of us that are old know that Arby's used to sell really cool glasses like these every Christmas back in the day. Maybe they still do. Who knows. Anyway, thank you Arby's.



And I got out my Christmas dishes and silver chargers. (After several "Where are the dishes?" promptings from Caitlin.)
I didn't know what chargers were until I met Caitlin.
Now I do.
They add a little something something to the place setting. Don't you think?
Go Caitlin. My bloggers and I thank you for making it look prettier.



Holly made place cards for everyone.



And dug the little picnic table out from under mountains of snow
so that we could have a
kids table
and lets be honest,
so that my dishes and fancy glasses had a
semblance of a chance of surviving unharmed.

She will kill me for posting this because the wind was blowing her jacket and hair but it truly illustrates the mountain that she had to dig through to unearth the table.
Don't worry Holly, all who know and love you know that you are beautiful and awesome for braving the blizzard.



Ta-da! Kids table. Caden and Saxon loved it.



It looked so pretty all layed out. They even lit Candles.

After, we exchange gifts, and then Caitlin wanted to take family pictures in front of the Christmas tree.


See how Beautiful this Family is?
Color Coordinated and all looking (after some candy bribery) and smiling.
Remember this, this is what I wanted mine to look like...
yeah right.



Holly and Cory and Bryn went next.
Holly immediately said, oh yuck, I don't have makeup on
and Bryn kept squirming and whining and we couldn't figure out why.
When we finally listened she was wailing.
"My pants fall OFF! My pants fall OFF!
Sure enough, when Cory pulled her up on his lap her pants had gotten caught and they were half off her bum.
We didn't even notice, she sure did.
Laughter, laughter, more laughter.
Bryn did not think it was so funny.
This picture was cropped in Brynley's Honor. Hehehe



Then it was my family's turn.
Remember i was rushed.
I forgot that I didn't put makeup on,
Kenna slept through dinner and had just woken up.
Cohen saw Saxon's candy and did not want to sit on my lap,
and Caden would not sit up, or make any kind of normal face for the camera,
and Ryan kept blinking so every other one his eyes were closed.

This is the best we got and even that is
far from stellar.
As is becoming my mantra
WHATEVER.
My life is too short to care that much,
but someday,
SOMEDAY,
we are going to have a good family picture taken.
Someday.

The boys had lovely faces for Aunt Holly. They love her!

So the dinner was fun,
the pictures, umm...lets say...entertaining.
Only Three cars got stuck in the mountains of snow outside,
and the dishes are almost done.

I would count it a success.

My Children are Junkies

TV Junkies that is.
They pretty much like anything animated.
Lately however, we have discovered Super Why?
Its on PBS, and whenever I turn it on they look like this the entire time.
They go into some kind of trance over the alphabet
and sounding out words.
I wish that I was so cool that they would hang on my every word.
Keep Dreaming Andrea.
Keep Dreaming.

Conversations in the snow...

"Hey Cohen."
"Wha?"
"Hey Cohen, Say cheese!"
"Ma!"
"No, say cheese, no stay there, stay there..."
"teese!"

"Mom?"
"Yeah?"
"I eat this?"
"Um. Sure."
"Is it yucky?"
"Probably"
"Oh."
And then she ate it.



"Caden look at me."
"Mooommm!"
"Look at me."
"The sun is too much. It hurts my eyes."
"Just try"
"Is that good."
"Yep. thanks bud."
"Can I go now?"